Things that Kayleigh taught me

As we go into a new year I was thinking about the thing that Kayleigh had taught us and things I should keep in mind for the year to come. For the new year i would like to remember Kayleigh by trying the think more like her in many areas:

1. Forgiveness - Kayleigh was very forgiving of many people that did the wrong thing by her. She was always the one to try and make things right between her and the others.
2. Happiness - Kayleigh was a happy person and tried to make sure that other people didn't get her down
3. Being grateful for what you have - Kayleigh was happy with what she had - she may not have had as much as some of her friends but she was fine with it. The few times that she asked for something and we couldn't afford it she never got sad or angry over it, but accepted it and said 'maybe later'.
4. Helping others - Kayleigh had a way in realising when others were down and needed help - even if she didn't know them and she helped them as much as she could - even if it just meant sitting down and listening to them and being a friend.
5. Trying your best - Kayleigh struggled in many of her classes (Maths, English) but she always gave it 100% even if she didn't get it. All I had ever asked of Kayleigh was that she tried her best - she didn't have to be good at it, just try.
6. Looking after yourself - Kayleigh was very into sport and nutrition and looking after your body - after all it is the only one you get.

Please comment on things that Kayleigh has taught you.

Golf

Kayleigh loved playing golf on the mini golf hole Terence made in the backyard at the house we lived in in Banks when Kayleigh was about 18 months old. Kayleigh quickly learnt that you hit the ball with the golf club and the point of the game was to gt the ball in the hole. So Kayleigh would hit the ball, waited until the ball stopped then ran over, picked up the ball and put it in the hole. It was so cute.

Terence made a mini-gold course in our backyard about 18 months ago, with bunkers and three holes. Kayleigh was really good (like all sports) and always beat me a golf. The only problem she had was hitting the ball too hard in our yard and making it hit the back fence behind the retaining wall - which is impossible to get the ball out of.

Getting ready to hit the ball

Putting the ball in the hole (Kayleigh is about 18 months old here)

Kayleighs Christmas

Kayleigh loved christmas and what we called her 'first' christmas was actually her second. Her 'first' christmas she was only 11 days old so we never counted that.

When we put up the christmas tree for the first time the look on Kayleighs face the next morning was priceless - she went out to the lounge room and stopped completely - I think she was wondering where on earth this tree had come from that had grown in the corner of the room. She did get used to it being there and was fascinated by the balls - which we had red, gold and silver ones - so much so that she did try eating several. Terence spent several times pulling small amounts of glass out of her mouth and bits of the colour. For some reason Kayleigh seemed to prefer the balls over the more palatable candy canes that were on the tree.

Kayleighs 'first' christmas was also Natassja's first as Natassja was born a month before. Kayleigh didn't quite get the idea of presents but has fun in the packaging and in the jump-o-lene that we bought for her that year.

Kayleigh at her 'first' christmas

Merry Christmas from Kayleigh

This is a picture Kayleigh drew last year of our Christmas tree. I didn't know we still had it until I found it in the crate we have put all of her things in.

Apologies

Sorry to All you people who read Kayleighs blog - the last week has been difficult for us and I have not found the strength to write about Kayleigh. I promise I should get something up in the next couple of days

Flexibility

Anyone who knew Kayleigh knew how flexible she was. Kayleigh was proud to know that she was uncommonly flexible and she loved showing off to anyone who came over. She would get on the trampoline and call out for the person to watch her and she would do a forward flip with no hands and then a backwards flip with hands. When she started High School last year, Ms Heading was amazed by the result Kayleigh got in the flexibility test. The test involved sitting down with your feet against a box which had a slide on top. The person being tested had to reach forward and push the slide as far as they could without bending their legs. Kayleigh pushed the slide all the way along the box and could have pushed it further it there was more room. Kayleigh could still do a backward arch and touch her feet with her hands. One regret that I have is that we never took Kayleigh to gymnastics as we couldn't afford it when she was younger - I know with her natural sport talent and her natural flexibility she would have been good at it, and she would have loved it.

Christmas Carols

Kayleigh loved christmas and was quite fond of carols. This probably started when she was a baby. Her Nanny had given her a  large white xmas bear for her very first christmas (she was only 11 days old) - one of the ones that when you pressed its hand it would play a christmas carol. When I put Kayleigh in her cot, I would use the bear and sing carols to her until she fell asleep. As she got older, she started to learn the words to the carols and sing them herself. Her favourite ones to sing were probably 'I saw Mummy kissing Santa Claus', 'Silent Night' and 'Away in a Manger' and of course Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer. Kayleigh enjoyed watching the 'Carols in the Domain' last Christmas on TV but was not impressed by the Wiggles (she never did like them) and equally unimpressed by Hi-5 now that the original members had all gone. Kayleigh had a very strong opinion on this - very funny to hear. Best of all, she was trying to teach Kiara the carols she knew - which was amusing as Kiara was only 3 at the time and didn't talk very clearly.

Family: Mum

Writing about the relationship between Kayleigh and myself is hard. Kayleigh was my first born and she was a special child (like all of them). I won't say Kayleigh and I had a perfect mother/daughter relationship because there were times that I got very frsutrated with her and there were times that she just didn't like me at all -- but I think that is like any other mother/daughter relationship out there.


Kayleigh was always there when I needed her to be - she helped with cleaning up and getting the other kids to do things. I suffered from PND - quite badly - and Kayleigh became almost a mini-mum in these times to try and take the pressure off. She managed to get Terry to clean his room and stop the other kids argueing when it was clear I was about to lose the plot. I helped Kayleigh with her homework when she didn't understand (apologies Mr Haidon the Shakespeare assignement was probably about 75% my doing and 25% Kayleigh) especially when she kept putting it off until the last minute because she didn't get it. Almost every night when I was getting them to go to bed, I would lay down with Kayleigh and Kiara (with Natassja on the top bunk) and talk to her about her day, the teachers and the people she spoke to in the day. I teased her about boys and talked in funny voices that sometimes creeped her out. We spoke about the difficulties she had with bullies and discussed strategies in dealing with them. We made up silly songs and sung to Kiara until she was asleep.


The thing that Kayleigh helped me with most was giving me the inspiration to lose weight. We got the WiiFit for xmas last year and every week Kayleigh would give me a hug and tell me I was getting smaller because her arms would go around me more (and never mentioned that she had probably grown in the week!). We would both get on the Wii Fit and verse each other trying to make the other lose by any means necessary - she gave me the motivation to do something about myself. Kayleigh told me she loved me everyday.

Being pregnant with Kayleigh

I was 18 when I fell pregnant with Kayleigh. I had only recently moved in with Terence and started university - but before you say anything, Kayleigh was planned - we wanted her from the start. My originally due date was the 9th of December (my birthday) which was revised to the 16th of December after the 4 week ultrasound. Kayleighs pregnancy was unremarkable. I only had one incident of morning sickness when I had a glass of milk one morning and then threw it up on the way to catch the bus to Uni. In the later half of the pregnancy I was working at Hungry Jacks in Tuggeranong as well as going to Uni. The worst thing about this was the way my feet would swell up by the end of the day and Terence would have to make me a bowl of ice water for me to put my feet in after work.

The day that Kayleigh was born I woke up at about 6am with a funny feeling - then my waters broke. Lucky for us, Terence had though ahead an put plastic under the sheet of my side of the bed - we had bought a new mattress only weeks earlier - so the bed didn't get any fluid on it. We quickly got my things and went to the hospital. I had not yet had any contractions. The midwife saw me an told us to go home and wait until the contractions were 5 minutes apart before we came back. So we went down to Tuggeranong and got some remaining baby things and went home. My dad turned up after midday to see how things were progressing and that's when the contracts started - first only every 20 minutes or so and getting more regular. By about 3pm the contractions were getting into the 'go to hospital' stage so Terence and I made the trek back to the hospital when we were admitted into Room 1 of the Birthing Suite. The birthing suite was lovely - a queen size bed, large bath and single room with lots of space.

Initially I spent time in the waiting area of the birthing unit with my knees on a chair, laying across a table on my elbows. The Midwife said it was a good position to allow the bay to adjust its position better. Eventually we went back into the room and put some music on - The soundtrack to 'Braveheart'. The contractions were started to get quite painful and I requested the Nitrous Oxide for pain relief. The midwife brought it in and gave me the breathing mask - funny enough though they are supposed to start the gas level at around 5% and then up it as they go. The midwife forgot to change from the last patient so I took a deep inhale and got all warm and fuzzy in the head and slumped almost asleep on the floor. The midwife then noticed that she had left it on 40% - not that I was complaining!!!!

Eventually, the midwifes though a warm bath would help the pain and I got into the lovely huge bath tub, nitrous oxide and all. The contractions were quite painful by this stage. . The NO2 was making me sleepy as well and Terence had trouble holding me up in the bath. The mid wives kept telling me not to push to let it come naturally and I told then I couldn't help it. They told me then to get out of the bath as second stage had kicked in.

I got out and they had me standing up holding onto a rail. They placed a mirror on the floor so I could see what was happening. I saw Kayleigh's head crowning and gave a really big push - and her head was born. The midwives all shouted to stop pushing (so they could check that the cord wasn't around her neck) and then the next contraction she was out! Terence cut the umbilical cord and the midwives cleaned her up and  she sneezed - the cutest little baby sneeze EVER! She never even cried. They weighed her and measured her and she was perfect. Kayleigh was born at 23:23 on the 14th of December after an 11 hour labour.

Birthday Parties

We were never much one for birthday parties with the kids - the thought of all those other kids running around the house was a little too much for us - mostly it was just family doing the birthday cake thing. Kayleigh did have two birthday parties to celebrate the two main milestone she got to -her 10th birthday and her 13th.

Kayleigh tenth birthday we had about 12 girls turn up at our house one Saturday for two hours. They did the whole 'find the lollipops in the backyard' which was fun - we found lollipops in the yard for WEEKS after that they missed. They did pass-the-parcel and complained that there wasn't prize in every single layer. One lovely little girl told Kayleigh that I obviously didn't know how to run a birthday party because everyone was supposed to get a prize and I was doing it all wrong. Then the girls found the fishpond in the backyard - I think they all ended up in it. One girl even stripped down to her underwear and ran around the backyard. The best part was when the girls ripped down all the decorations and popped all the balloons at once. Kayleigh had a great time.

For Kayleighs 13th birthday she had a BBQ and movie night - she invited 5 people but only 2 could come - they both turned up and informed us that thy had already eaten because they were vegetarian!! So much for the BBQ. They watched two movies - Ice Age 3 and something else I can't remember and Kayleigh was really happy.

Freckles

Kayleigh always had freckles (well except when she was a new born) and she had a large freckle on her nose which she was sometime a little self concious off. Kayleigh was a outdoors child and that is probably why she had so many freckles, but they were starting to fade a little as they do when you get older. I always though she looked beautiful and her freckles were always part of her and her personality.

From Nastaha Bedingfield (one of Kayleighs favourite singers) and her song 'Freckles':

'cause a face without freckles is like a sky without stars
Why waste a second not loving who you are
Those little imperfections make you beautiful, lovable, valuable,
They show your personality inside your heart
Reflecting who you are

Some of Kayleighs' work

Shown is some of Kayleigh work ad ommens from her Year 6 portfolio - I finally dug it out today. You can see some of her work and what she thought about it.

School: Year 7 Technology - Wood and Metal

Kayleigh stopped doing Band and picked up Design Technology: Wood & Metal in second semester with Mr Barkley. This class was Kayleighs favourite and all the help she gave her dad over the years really helped.

For the wood component of the class, Kayleigh made a pencil box - and even her dad was impressed by the finished product - the corners were flush and the finish was impeccable. For the metal component she made a pen holder which she gave to her granddad. For the plastics component Kayleigh made a mobile phone holder with a picture of Tweety bird in plastic on it - it was quite cute and she used it to hold her mobile while it was charging.

Kayleigh chose to do wood and metal work in Year 8 because she loved it. For year 7 she got an 'A' and her report from Mr Barkley read ' Kayleigh demonstrated outstanding achievement of the knowledge , skills and understandings expected. Her conscientious application to all aspects of this subject is reflected in excellent results. Kayleigh is an enthusiastic and confident student who has demonstrated a high level of understanding this semester.'

School: Year 7 Indonesian

Kayleigh had Indonesian for second semester year 7 with Ms White. Kayleigh did not really like Indonesian - she found it a little boring and she didn't see the point. But, as usual, she gave it all she had. Her assignment was to create a childrens book which she did on Fruit 'mana mana' which is displayed in the library to this day.

Kayleigh may not have liked Indonesian, but as she did try, she did well and got an 'A' and the Academic achievement award for Year 7 Indonesian that semester.

School: Year 7 Dance and PE

Kayleigh had Ms Heading for Dance and PE in Year 7. Kayleigh chose to do dance in the first semester of year 7 even though she had no experience with dance or anything like it. She was in a class with some of the girls that were nasty to her in year 6 and it made her self conscious about what she was doing. Kayleigh had co-ordination but lacked rhythm. Ms Heading mentioned that Kayleigh was the most flexible girl she had in dance but Kayleigh found it difficult to 'get' some of the moves - she particularly had trouble with 'popping'. One of her friends told us that she had been trying to show Kayleigh how to do the move properly and ended up doing it the way Kayleigh was instead - which they both found really funny. The only part of dance Kayleigh didn't like was the assignment - she had to watch 'Step Up' (a movie) and answer some questions. Now Kayleigh favourite types of movies don't include American style 'bad boy meets good girl' dance movies and she found it extremely tedious to watch - and she forced me to watch it to so I could help her with her assignment if necessary. Kayleigh got a B for Dance and an A for PE.

School: Year 7 Food

Kayleigh had 'technology' Food in first semester of year 7 with Ms Deo. Kayleigh liked the class but couldn't understand a word the teacher was saying. They cooked the basic things in this class - ANZAC biscuits, Orange basket. Kayleigh's teacher, although hard to understand said the Kayleigh was a good student with excellent food presentation skills (must have got that from Terence) and a pleasure to teach. Kayleigh got a B for this class, but she said she never wanted to do it again.

School: Year 7 Maths

Maths was probably Kayleighs hardest subject - she always struggled with it and some of the concepts where just hard for her to figure out. For Year 7, Kayleigh was in level 3 with Mrs Kupke. At parent teacher interview Mrs Kupke said Kayleigh was a good student that really had trouble linking concepts together. Kayleigh was put into the quick start program, that was designed to assist students with maths difficulties in learning and remembering the basics - like times tables and basic addition and subtraction tricks. This program really helped her in her calculations and both myself and the teacher could see a marked improvement in her work from this. Kayleigh achieved a C in Maths - probably the highest maths mark she ever got.

School: Year 7 Science

Kayleigh started the year in Level 3 science (the bottom level) because she did poorly in Year 6. However with a change of school and the resounding change of attitude, Kayleigh excelled at Science. Her first teacher was impressed by Kayleighs knowledge of the elements and the periodic table and her behaviour in class. Kayleigh had to do group work and a speech and she managed to persuade some of the disruptive students to assist in the task (I think one had a crush on her - so that helped).

The second semester Kayleigh was put up into Level 2 with Ms Thompson. Again, she shined in this class, achieving a B at the end of the year. Kayleigh got 98% in a home assignment to write out the procedure for measuring temperature when melting ice-cubes - she only lost marked for missing a leg on the tripod in the scientific diagram.

School:Year 7 Band

Kayleigh only did band for the first semester of Year 7 - she had Mr Cusack and she didn't seem to get on with him much. It must have been a personality thing as everyone else seemed to think he was great.

Kayleigh played the flute in band - and I was very proud of her for doing as well as she did. Kayleigh was in the intermediate band even though she had been playing the flute for only 6 months - she was as good as girls that had been playing for 2 or 3 years as part of the schools band program in primary school (she may have had a advantage because I also play the flute and I taught her).

She did have trouble reading music so we spent a lot of time writing the names of the notes on her music sheets. Kayleigh favourite song to play in band was the Pirate of the Caribbean melody. Unfortunately, when Kayleigh had to play individually for assessment at the end of the semester she had a cold and it was playing her asthma up badly. Trying to play the flute while trying to breathe is difficult and after the assessment Mr Cusack mentioned that he though she was better than that. This really got the Kayleigh and she asked me to allow her to change out of Band - which I did. Kayleigh got a C for band - not bad for a girl, with asthma, who had only been playing for 1 year.

School: Year 7 SOSE

Kayleigh also had Mr Haidon for year 7 SOSE (Studies of Society and the Environment). Kayleigh was good at SOSE and I believe she got the concepts well. At the parent teacher interviews I was told that Kayleigh was well behaved in class even though there was some other 'disruptive' students in the class. She always applied herself and got her woprk done.

SOSE is the class that Kayleigh liked to tell Mr Haidon he was wrong. The LED TV she showed him was during a SOSE excursion to the Hyperdome to learn about advertising. The assignment on Blu-ray was for a technological compenent of SOSE. Kayleigh did so well at SOSE she won an acedemic acheivement award for it that year - meaning she came in the top 2 in her class. And she got her first 'A' ever.

School: Year 7 English

Kayleigh had Mr Haidon for english n Year 7. Some of things she did she found easy and others she really struggled with. Kayleigh had to write a story that included three different elements - and she wrote a great little story about a dragon, a dragon killer and the politician. She had a do a assignment/poster on letter sounds and she created a really 'out there' poster that is still hanging in Mr Haidons room.

Kayleigh struggled with assignments and work that required analysis on subjective things, or tasks that did not have definative outcomes. Her Shakespeare assignement on the theatre she found very difficult to complete as she did not have a set of questions to answer - but research and making up her own project based on the knowledge she gained. Her best assignment was anything that required a speech - these she was good at.

Otto

As a family, we didn't play computer games much and we didn't have a Wii or anything until last Christmas - however their was a game on my desktop computer that Kayleigh that she played for almost 12 months until she finished it. The game was called Otto's Magic Blocks

The purpose of the games was to bounce Otto on each of the squares, turning them the correct colour while avoiding the other creatures. One of the 'creatures' she called Oi Oi Boy because everytime Otto got close to him he when 'Oi' and chased after Otto. Extra points were given if you strung together  a series of blocks without bouncing on a already changed block.

I tried to beat Kayleigh score on many occasions but I was never successful - Kayleigh had a knack at playing this game even though she would have been only 8 or so when we had it. Kayleigh was excellent at figuring out the best way around each level to maximise her points and was just better at navigating her way around the creatures.

Roast Lamb

We had roast lamb for dinner last night and it reminded me of all the roast lamb dinners we had as a family over the last few years.

Kayleigh loved roast lamb and every time we cooked it Kayleigh and I would argue over who got the lower leg bit. As a child, my mother always got it, so I as a 'grown up' I felt entitles to it as the meat was always tender and I like chewing on the bone. Kayleigh felt the same way. Each time I got the roast out of the oven I would be fending off Kayleigh and her knife and fork trying to get to the piece before I put it on my plate.

Eventually, we started buying a side of lamb that came with not only the roast leg of lamb, but an extra lower leg piece - which solved our problem - I got my piece and Kayleigh got hers. No more scuffles in the kitchen . . .

School: Year 7 Camp

Everyone at camp

Kayleigh was so excited when she found out she was going to a camp at the beginning of Year 7. The camp was inland (I forget the exact place) and she wnet dirt buggy riding, made a raft and did all sorts of fun things. Kayleigh made a few of her friend at camp and she was so happy that we let her go.

Kayleigh phoned us each night as she took my mobile with her and hid it in her pillow. She told us that she shared the dirt buggy with Ethan and they almost tipped over. Kayleigh told us she won the limbo contest - which she found easy (pics to come) and she had a great time.

Winning the Limbo contest

Raft Building

Finding Money

From an early age, Kayleigh seemed to have an obsession with money - especially finding it when we were at the shops. Every day that we went shopping Kayleigh would be checking underneath counter and the supermarket checkouts and picked up everything she found, even it it was just 5c. Kayleigh saved all the money that he found and most time she would come home with at least a $1 to add to her savings. The best find was under the photo/DVD counter in Kmart - the store person said they could go behind the counter and keep anything she found - I think the total was close to $10.

A day in december last year, Kayleigh found $20 on the path outside the Commonwealth Bank in Tuggeranong. We looked for the owner but couldn't see anyone so Kaylegh decided to keep it, but not for herself. With the $20, the first thing she bought was a coffee for her dad, and then she paid for a family Christmas photo. She insisted that we were all in it (even though I hate having my picture taken) an I am so glad that I did. It was to be the last Christmas we had together.

Favourite: Toys

As Kayleigh got older her choice of favourite toys changed (as everyone does) and her choices reflected what she liked as opposed to what was ''popular'' at the time.

As a baby Kayleighs favourite toy was her rocking horse that she called 'Row Row'. She got Row Row for Christmas just after she turned one, and she would spend hours and hours on him rocking. As previously written in a post, for a number of years she had her Moosie. When she was about 7, I got Kayleigh a Care Bear which she had several 'talking' ones. She also got into Winx as well. For her tenth birthday, one of her friends bought her a Bratz doll - much to her disgust - as she hated Bratz and the only Barbie she ever owned had an unfortunate accident and lost its head and legs within days of Kaylegh getting it. The christmas that Kayleigh was 11, she got a Robosapien (clear) which played with for months - she really liked to have him do its dance and she taught herself to dance the same way - it was too funny watching her.

When Kayleigh got into High School she wanted more electronic toys.For her final christmas she got a Wii, and she also got an R2D2 - which was voice activated and controlled and funny enough this R2D2 only seemed to respond to Kayleighs voice, every time I tried to use him he wouldn't work.

Noo-Noo Kisses

Kayleigh loved teletubbies as a child - her favourite was Laa-Laa and she had a talking Laa-Laa for her 2nd christmas because she wanted it really badly.

Kayleigh always though the Noo-Noo was funny (Noo-Noo was teh vacuum cleaner) - the way it sucked up the Tubby toast and tubbytustard. Kayleigh invented a new way of giving Terence and I kisses, which she called Noo-Noo kisses - she would give us a kiss on our cheek and suck in a little. It felt a little weird and she always laughed after. I miss Noo-Noo kisses even though it has been years since I last got one.

Roses

We have had a rose garden in front of our house on and off since we have been here. All the children had a rose bush to call their own. Kayleigh always chose the white iceberg rose everytime. I think she liked the pure white as she liked wearing white clothes as well.

Each year we always had a bet whose rose would flower first, most years it was Terence's Kardinal rose, one year it was my Queen Elizabeth. The iceberg rose never flwered first much to Kayleighs disgust. This year Kayleighs iceberg rose was the very last one to flower.

Ghosts

Kayleigh believed in ghosts and though that we had a ghost in our house because some of the unexplainable things that sometimes happened. First the computer turned on by itself. Then Terence's battery razor turned on in the middle of the night, when I went the check on it, I turned the light on and it turned off, and then when I turned the light off, it turned back on again. A remote fell off a shelf and then when it was put on the shelf it immediately fell off again. Lastly, Kayleigh was standing on one of our stools (the type that you can ajust the height) and it went up all by itself with Kayleigh on it.

Since Kayleigh died, there had been two instances of unexplained thing, both with nerf guns. We have the battery powered Nerf 'Machine gun' and one time Terry was cleaning up his room and it shot him in the bum with no-one around him. It paused and then shot him until there was no bullets left. The second time, a different Nerf gun was sitting on Kayleigh's bed and started shooting when no-one was in the room.
 

Denon

Denon is our current German Shepherd. When we picked him up form the breeder, Kayleigh held him the whole way home from Kaleen to Theodore and made sure he was happy. Kayleigh taught him to lay down on command after I had taught him how to sit.

Kayleigh play fought with Denon every afternoon after school, running around the backyard with Denon  chasing her and throwing him the ball. She would play tug-a-war with a tea towel and tease Denon and then give him a big hug. Kayleigh always helped give Denon a bath - which was a task in itself as he is such a big dog. The day Kayleigh dies, a friend of our said he was whining at the gate, which is unusual for Denon - maybe he knew what was happening.

Denon as a puppy

Rollerblading

I had a pair of rollerblades whcih I left behind at my Dad's house when I moved in with Terence. along with this was a pair of rollerblades my younger brother had. Kayleigh discovered the rollerblades when she was about 7 - but they were too big for her to use. By the time she was 10, she put on thick socks and practiced rollerblading in her Grandpas backyard. Kayleigh and Natassja would go up and down the path for hours.

Eventually, grandpa decided they were good enough to take out of the backyard, so he took Kayleigh and Natassja to Lake Burley Griffin where they rollerbladed (while Grandpa walked) between the two bridges and past the carillion. Kayleigh really enjoyed rollerblading - she liked the feeling of gliding. Kayleigh went rollerblading with Grandpa alot as he wanted to do walking for exercise - and he always bought her a gelato after :)

School: Year 6

Kayleigh had Ms Strangward for year 6, and as I have previously mentioned before Kayleigh did not have a good time in Year 6 and this came out in her attitude at school and at home.

Kayleigh constantly came home angry and many times in tears becuase of the way that the other girls in her class treated her. Many times she told me she wanted to die because there was no reason to live. As a Mum, that really was distressing to see her like that. We had so many discussions with her teacher and the principal but nothing was ever done. Kayleigh was teased about her asthma, told she was fat and ugly, told she was anorexic and stupid. Kayleigh found the boys were OK to talk to - several times Brandon Jackson told the other girls to leave her alone, he was always asking Kayleigh how she was going with her asthma and looked after her. She also talked with the boys about TV shows like Doctor Who and Top Gear. Unfortunately, the other girls in her class then turned on the boys that talked to Kayleigh and teased them until it was easier not to talk to Kayleigh, so she ended up with no-one to talk to in class. And then someone thought it would be amusing to steal all of Kayleigh's connector pens which she had been collecting, and put rotten food in her bag, and to kick her bag off the  portable deck into the weeds and mud.

Outside of class, Kayleigh would either go to the library or hang out with Natassja and her friends. Unfortunately, Natassja also had a bully problem and this bully also got Kayleigh in her sights. This particular bully was not verbal, but physical and would hit and push Kayleigh and Natassja. She came up behind Kayleigh in the library and cut her hair. She smashed Natassja head against the sink in the girls toilet and pinned her to the ground punching her. It got to a stage where the school was not doing anything and we  stopped the kids going for a week to see if we could move school. Calwell primary was too full to take them and other primary schools were to out of area to accept them. We had no choice but to take them back, after discussions with the principal who assured us that things would change - but they didn't.

Kayleigh hated school in Year 6 - she didn't get higher than a D (yes even in PE) and she was glad to see the end of it. The start of Calwell High saw such a change in attitude in her and that was mainly because most of her bullies went to MacKillop instead of Calwell so she had a chance to make new friends.

Memory: Erika Kesby

This post was written by Erika Kesby - someone who went to Calwell High with Kayleigh
________________________________________

I didnt actually know Kayleigh that well, but when I went to calwell and saw her around she was always either smiling or laughing. And this always managed to put me and all my friends into a good mood as well. Even though we didn't know her we all loved Kayleigh and one day I went up to her and said, " Hey, Me and my friends have seen you around? Why are u happy all the time?" She looked at us, laughed and said " because, I have a roof over my head, food to eat, and a family that loves me. Some People dont have that at all." Me and all my friends were shocked. So that's why, so from now on when we get mad at something at our homes we think about what Kayleigh said.

My heart will go on

As previously mentioned Kayleigh most favourite song in the whole world was Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On - I listened to it for the first time since Kayleighs funeral today and it was really really hard. I couldn't finish it.

Kayleigh loved that song from the time we got Titanic on special edition DVD a couple of years ago (I think she was in Year 6) so we bought her the Celine Dion CD for her birthday. At that stage I bought Kayleigh a flute from St Vinnies and I taught her the basic fingering and how to read music. The first thing she did was go to her Grandpas house and print the sheet music for "my heart will go on'. I then taught her how to play it.

Once Kayleigh remembered how it went, she then transferred it onto the keyboard, her guitar and then even Kiara's toy crocodile xylophone. Kayleigh memorized the words and loved singing it - and she was terrible!!!

Jewellery

Kayleigh got her ears pierced at the age of 8 and she has had a thing for jewellery for most of her life, although she wasn't very good at not losing it.

When she was little, Kayleigh had a charm bracelet with a charm of a swan that we bought from a small amount for her birthday when my grandmother died. She wore it on and off for a couple of years before it was lost. After Kayleigh got her ears pierced she always seemed to manage to lose one earring - no matter if it was a stud or loop earring. She lost sleepers and studs a like. We were always throwing out one earring like people throw out odd socks.

Kaleigh loved wearing necklaces and she had a few over the years. Te last one she got with her "k" pendant she got two Christmases ago. She had a habit of 'overloading' her necklaces and putting far too much on them  like her K, her Sagittarius pendant, and other things and the necklaces would break. Kayleigh would sometimes then swap he necklaces for Natassjas - meaning that Natassja then had a broken necklace which wasn't very nice.

Kayleigh also liked wearing the chains the Terence bought. They were thick silver chains that were originally bought to melt down into silver wire for use in his Hi-Fi system. Kayleigh claimed on and a matching bracelet and wore them to school.

Family: Natassja

Kayleigh was not even 1 when Natassja was born. Their relationship was on the whole quite good for sisters who are close in age. I think the best way to describe it is to define their personalities and how different they were. As we all know, Kayleigh was the sporty outgoing one - who loved climbing on things, running and doing backflips. Natassja, on the other hand is more reserved and arty. The funny thing is, the one thing we praised the other for being, they wanted to be better at. In her end of Year 6 'About me', Natassja wrote that she wanted to be more flexiable, where as Kayleigh had written that she wanted to be able to draw better.

Kayleigh and Natassja got on quite well when they weren't fighting. As previously mentioned, Natassja was happy to let Kayleigh hang around with her friends when no-one wanted to talk to her. They talked for hours at night before going to sleep (as they shared a room) about school and boys. They teased each other and helped each other. Natassja found it good this year at High School as Kayleigh had already done most of the assignments she got, so all she had to do was ask Kayleigh how to complete them.

Kayleigh and Natassja did fight - and loudly. Kayleigh would get irritated at Natassja for not helping clean their room because she was busy drawing. Natassja would get angry at Kayleigh for taking her things and not giving them back. They would yell at each other, Kayleigh would hit Natassja, Natassja would scream back and then Terence and I would have to intervene. They then spent the next hour or so sniping at each other.

But they did everything together - Kayleigh was the oldest child, but Natassja tried to help out as she could. They were very different in personalities but they helped each other and looked out for each other. They worked together one recess to clean Mr Macks' classroom at school - I don't know why - but I think that shows the co-operation that they had together - even though they 'hated' each other some days, they always were someone they could count on when they needed it.

Kayleigh - Drawn by Natassja

Memory: Marcelle de Almeida & Ashley Knowles

This post was written by Marcelle de Almeida & Ashley Knowles - friend of Kayleighs at Calwell High.

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Kayleigh was the same age as both of us even though were a year above her in school years, even with the school year in between us we got to know Kayleigh very well. . .

Kayleigh was extremely sporty ! we competed against Kayleigh in cross country and athletics , she was our biggest threat as she was so darn good she would always whoop our butts ! she was so fast she'd win by a mile. She was amazing at cross country.

One of the many things that we love about Kayleigh is the fact that even though she beat us in our events she would always come over with a huge smile on her face, hug us and tell us we did amazing. She was a true athlete and an amazing competitor.

I remember when Kayleigh was in year seven, at the athletics carnival me ( Marcelle ) and Dara Haigh ran the 1500 m with Kayleigh as we worked out we would come 1st second and third and all make it through to zone together, sadly there was a mix up and none of us went , but it was an amazing race. .. . Kayleigh talked with me and told me things i never knew.

She was such an amazing and talented girl, we will both miss competing against her.

School: Year 5

For Year 5, Kayleigh had  Ms Woods. Year 5 was the real start of Kayleigh problems with friends and bullies. As we all know, girls of this age start becoming rather nasty to other girls for all sorts of reasons. As Kayleigh had few friends, and kept to herself, and didn't have the same interests as other girls she was a target.

Some girls told her that she was fat - which led to some talks between myself, Kayleigh and her teacher to ensure that Kayleigh was eating her lunch. Kayleigh was moved away in the class from the girl that was creating the issues to try and settle things down a bit.

Academically, Kayleigh was going OK - she was still struggling with Maths and english and she only managed 1 'C' grade - for PE with the rest being 'D' and 1 'E' for maths. You might wonder at the 'C' for PE . . . . . . .like I did until you realise that most PE classes at Primary are team based sport, and who wants the outcast in their team?

Her Last Week

The last week that Kayleigh was alive was probably the best week that we had as a family - everything seemed to be going great. The weekend before the hyperdome was having some sort of promotional things and we all got free hot chocolates and Jelly Belly Jelly beans. Terence and Kayleigh (and me) worked together to get the frame of the carport up - in some very wet weather - but it was good.

On the Monday, Kayleigh went to school and had a great time - she had to talk to Mrs Thompson about her Biome assignment and the fact that Mrs Thompson had missed two marks - meaning Kayleigh got the joint top mark in Year 8 for the assignment.

On the Tuesday, Kayleigh had the day off as she had been awake with her asthma overnight. She helped her dad put the roof on the car port. She walked with the other kids down to the school and watched Terry come first in the round the oval race. Terence showed Kayleigh how to do a 'death drop' off the monkey bars and she was so excited when she did it. When I found out I told not to do it by herself as it is dangerous - you could fall wrong, break your neck and die. Kayleigh promised she would only do it with her dad around.

On the Wednesday, Kayleigh went to school but came home at lunch time - she had sent her dad a text message saying 'Dad I feel like im going to pass out'. Terence rang her and told her to come home. I also had a half day at work that day as I was felling flu'ey. Terence had the flu too and felt aches and pains.
That night we had a babysitter (Monica) come around and Terence and I went down the club and had a great diner and won $33 on the pokies. We rented two movies one which we watched when we got home 'Armoured'. Kayleigh did her usual trick of getting Kiara to sleep and then sneaking out and watching the movie. I caught her several times and each time she would get up and run back to her room. At the end of the movie she came around the corner and gave both me and Terence a big hug and said good night. That was the last time Terence spoke with her (whilst actually awake). Kayleigh woke me up around 3:30/4 with her asthma playing up again. We found a paper bag to use as a spacer and Kayleigh said she felt better and I went back to bed. That was the last time I spoke with her.

Noodles

Now, you may think that this post is about noodles - 2 minute noodles and the like (which Kayleigh loved) but it's not . .

When Kayleigh was learning to talk she always had trouble saying the word needle - so she used noodle as a substitute. It was always funny to hear her say 'Mum I need a noodle to fix my shirt'. It became an on-going joke in our house. Every time I needed a Needle I would say to Kayleigh " I need a noodle' - and I always got what I needed. - and we still say it to this day.

Storm Chasing

One thing Kayleigh loved to do was go storm chasing in Summer whn storms were coming over the Brindabellas. We would all pile into the car and drive near to where the storms were occurring. Kayleigh loved the lightning and thunder and the heavy rain that came with storms, and it was even better when it hailed. The day the Theodore and Richardson copped a huge storm (New Years Eve 2008(?)) we had been all around Canberra watching the storms brewing and had even gone down to Lanyon homestead and saw the storm that was to come.

One time, when storm chasing in Macather, we hit a Kangaroo in the tarago we had at the time. The car was OK, but we killed the kangaroo - Kayleigh was so upset and made us turn around to check that the kangaroo was in fact dead - and it was. We went home early that day as Kaleigh was too upset to enjoy the storms.

Kayleigh and Terence would get on the internet when storms were brewing and check the weather radar to see where the storms would intensify. Kayleigh and Terence would then go chasing the storm cell. It was a great andrenaline rush.

The storm - New Years Eve - we storm chased this :)

Fashion

Kayleigh never had much of an interest in fashion trends - when girls her age were wearing flared jeans - she wore trackies. When girls were wearing low cut jeans - she wore trackies and when girls were wearing particular brands of clothing and shoes, she wore what she wanted.

Kayleigh was most comfortable in trackies and shirts from known sports brands - Adidas, Nike, Reebok, New balance etc - but only after she reached about 10. Before that she just wore what she thought was comfortable. She had no idea about colour matching. WE got alot of her 'sports brand' clothes from St Vinnies as people give away some really nice, near new stuff that fit Kayleigh perfectly. She was always excited to find some thing new - a Adidas shirt for $4, trackies for $6 - brand new. Kayleigh didn't like wearing jeans - she always found them uncomfortable because she was skinny and not short - so getting jeans that fit properly was impossible. Kayleigh believed clothes are for wearing and you should feel comfortable wearing them.

Her favourite clothes - which she was cremated in was her short white skirt, her adidas t-shirt and her bubblegum coloured asiscs. She loved those asiscs - the were the first shoes we had bought her in year 7 and they were blue and green coloured - like bubblegum. She actually needed a new pair and we had planned togo shopping the weekend to buy her a new pair.

Kayleigh and her favourite New Balance shirt

Always wearing trackies . . .

Clothes should be comfortable :)

School: Year 4

For Year 4, Kayleigh had a lovely teaher by th name of Ms Klose. Kayleigh did very well in her class and progressed well with her maths and reading. I was readlly an uneventful year - Kayleigh played with Natassja and her friends at lunch times and got on with her work during school times. She did have issues with bullying but not much as she kept to herself. Her teachers all remarked how helpful Kayleigh was - staying behind to help clean the classroom and pick up the chairs and clean he whiteboard - in a way I think this was because she wanted to help, but also avoid the playground.

Kayleigh was very proud of herself this year as she could swing on the monkeybars and miss 3 rungs in between an no-one else could do it :)

Politics

Politic never played a big role in our house - probably for long time I was the only one that could vote until Terence became an Australian Citizen  just before the election that Mr Rudd won.

Kayleigh was doing a course on Australian Politics in Year 8 and it was then that she started asking about and having conversations about politics. She was working on an assignment for a board game for SoSE based on politics and the courts which was due the day she died.

When Kayleigh passed away, Kevin Rudd was still the PM and Tony Abbott the opposition leader and she talked to me one day about her feelings on the two men. Kayleigh thought that Mr Rudd was OK, but he seemed to spend more time out of the country than in it. Kayleigh thought he was doing a good job in spending money on education and some more on health but could do more about important things like ambulances and police  - which I then had to tell her was a state responsibility. Kayleigh did not like Mr Abbott at all - she thought he looked like a used car salesmen and she didn't like his views on women. Kayleigh thought that he should never be PM.

I don't know where she got these views from - as I said we don't discuss politics at home....I wonder what she would have made of Ms Gillard?

Dad's Birthday

Todays is Terences birthday and it reminded me of how excited Kayleigh got when it was someones birthday in the family.

About a week before Terences birthday Kayleigh would make a birtday card. If she stuffed it, or didn't like it, she would start another until it was perfect. Kayleigh would get the other kids to write their names in it so it was really personal.

On the day, as soon asshe woke up she would come start into our bedroom and give Terence a huge hug and say Happy Birthday daddy!!! and then she would make Terence a cup of tea.

Kayleigh was always so excited and happy and I miss it more today than other days.

Hair

As a little girl it was impossible to get Kayleigh still long enough to brush her hair - she always had things to do and places to go. She had very fine hair, and not alot of it.

It was only when she got the high school when she started taking car of her hair properly, brushing it every day  - in fact she gone to the opposite of what she was previously. Everyday I would tell her to get out of my room (where we have full lenght mirrors) and stop brushing her hair - if most days it was several times I had to tell her to get out! She started using my shampoo and conditioner instead of the cheaper brand we get the kids and everytime I'd tell her not to use it, and everytime she washed her hair she'd use mine. One time she left me nothing and I had o use the kids shampoo ......Kayleigh was the same with my hairbrush and my hair clips - several times I had to go looking for my brush and found under her pillow or in her bag. One time I couldn't find it and had to got to work with my hair unbrushed grrrrrrrrr......

The last day she was alive, I had bought a butterfly hair clip. I got home and the first thing Kayleigh did was tak it out of my hair and put it in hers. I was a little annoyed at her and took it back - we laughed about it. After Kayleigh passed away I put this clip in her hair, just for her . . . . .  .

Building the Deck

Kayleigh loved helping her dad build things and at the start of Year 7, she helped her dad build our deck.

Kayleigh helped by finding the right lengths of the merbau and holding it when Terence was drilling the pilot holes. She had a go at using the drill to put in the screws and helped me with lining up the bards when they were warped. Kayleigh made sure that the screws and nails were available straight away when we needed them.

When all the boards were down Kayleigh helped sand it and do the finishing - all she wanted was to be involved - and she was.



Kayleigh and the deck



Memory: Katie Collins

This post was written by Katie Collins - Kayleigh's aunt on Terences side.
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I remember walking into the birthing room at Canberra Hospital and zoning in on little Kayleigh.  Right away I noticed how amazingly good looking she was for a newborn baby.  In fact, I was so blown away by how good looking she was, I could not stop commenting on it.  Most babies are fairly blotchy after birth; sleepy.  But this baby was so clean it was if she'd been through a dry cleaner.  The only evidence of her recent birth was a tiny blotch of blood on her head;  in all other respects she looked as though she'd been dropped in through the ceiling into the world, and not gone through a normal birth at all.  Her complexion was perfect - that struck me.  It was perfectly even all over.  And she had a lovely skin colour, it really hit me - like palest of pale honey, and smooth, like velvet.  She had the loveliest rose bloom in each cheek, a little blush, like a painting.  Her face did not have a single mark upon it, not a single one, and her head was beautifully shaped, like what you would expect of a ceasarean birth.  Her eyes were wide open and she was wide awake and very aware.  I'm not sure if this was because Judith had no drugs in birth or not, but I was very struck by how "aware" this baby was for a newborn.  No sleepy looks, she stared right into my face, wide awake, and definitely seeing me.  As I looked upon her face I was struck by what an absolutely gorgeous looking baby she was.  In all my experiences with other newborns, generally they looked like - well newborns, unless they were your own.  Nothing special, usually tired and blotchy looking!  but THIS newborn had these wide open clear eyes, staring into mine like an old soul, and this perfect complexion, with the most amazingly good looking face I had ever (and have ever since) seen in a baby.  I was so struck by how good looking she was I could not stop talking about it, for her entire life.  To this day, I have never seen a baby (or young child) so perfect.  Every feature was amazingly perfect, in symmetry, and SO pretty; I will always remember Kayleigh as the prettiest newborn baby I had ever seen in my entire life.  throughout her babyhood and toddler years she remained absolutely gorgeous.  She looked like a perfect little Dresden doll to me.  Big eyes, amazing cheekbones, wide smile - I always commented on her looks, I couldn't get over what an extremely pretty child she was; As she got older, her looks struck me more and more - she became, to me, to be the most unusually beautiful children I had ever seen.  To me she looked like a perfect little fairy, and she had something "elfin" about her.  She looked "otherworldly" to me.  I always imagined her with wings on her back and a wand in her hand.  I used to call her "elf" when I saw her and she always laughed (probably politely thinking I was crazy.)  I did not see her for three years, from 7 to 10.  When I saw her again, I was even more caught up in her fairy tale book look.  Not only did she look good, but she was also lovely in her attitude.  Polite and funny, she loved treats and whenever she got one, I noticed she always shared it with her brothers and sisters.  I saw she loved dogs, as I do, and made a great fuss of mine, and this warmed me (and in those days I was hard to warm.)  Alissa took to her immediately and wanted to 'give her everything'.  She dug out clothes, shoes, bags.  She always loved her and asked to see her.  We both agreed she looked and acted exactly like a fairy! Alissa saw in her what I did, something very 'otherworldly' about her.  I don't know what it was.  but it was something very special, an "otherness" from everyone else. 

My mother remembers Kayleigh as the carer of her brothers and sisters, carefully doling out treats she'd given to them so they could all nibble and share equally.  She never grabbed or took more.  She doled everything out and they all nibbled in delight.  I remember the last time I saw her that Terence pointed out how big her feet were, and that perhaps that meant she would be very tall, and when I checked them out I realised he was right, she DID have really big feet!  And I do wonder if maybe Kayleigh was going to be very tall and willowy when she was an adult.  I can picture her quite perfectly as an adult; I don't think her face would have changed dramatically, but I do think her cheekbones and overall 'elfin" look would have become even more apparent and probably made her seem a lot younger than everyone. 

I think as a woman Kayleigh Stamp would have been breathtaking, enough to be a model.  Because she "had something" special to her looks.  that certain zing, not conventional, something else.  Last time we all spoke, she was coy about a boy at school.  I'm sorry I never got to know her better and didn't get the chance to be the aunt I would have liked to have been.  I wish I had of.  Maybe what I saw in Kayleigh way back then was in fact that she looked like an "angel". :) I certainly never saw her act in any way but positive and lovely in the entire time I knew her.  she BEAMED goodness.  that will always be true.

Memory: Alexandra Crouch

This post is written by Alexandra Crouch
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Kayleigh was an amazing, adventurous, kind, loving, caring, forgiving, artistic young lady.  Kayleigh was my best friend and also a really good mentor to young kids. Kayleigh taught me many things like; judo, how to climb trees fast, how to draw things really well and most of all how to be a good friend. I have been friends with kayleigh for a long time and in that time me and kayleigh came to realize that we acted more and more like sisters everyday, kayleigh and I would fight like sisters have arguments like sisters and also be very helpful to one another like sisters would but we also loved one another [ like best friends and sisters]. I remember when Kayleigh, Natassja, Tayla and me were trying to figure out nicknames for one another, and Kayleigh piped up and said well this was a nickname that me and my old friend called each other but I think it is quite cool, so me, Tassj and Tayla looked at her and said "what are they kayleigh?"  and kayleigh said well, I can be K.K, Alexandra you can be A.A, Natassja you can be N.N and Tayla you can be T.T! We all thought about the nicknames and I turned to Kayleigh and smiled "I like them, I think that they are cool" I said and everyone else agreed. We have called each other those names ever since I can remember. Kayleigh was a great friend and always will be. Kayleigh and I are monkey buddies as we always climbed tree's together, especially this tree in particular, it was the tree where we would separate [ she would go up the hill to her house and I would keep on the path], kayleigh and I would get to the top of it which was really cool. When we were in primary school there were always days where I wouldn't feel like eating my custard or something and kayleigh would come by remove it from my lunch box and say " thank you A.A" and we would both laugh about it afterwards.

 

When kayleigh was starting high school she was a bit nervous at first but after a couple of days she was telling me how many friends she had made and how awesome the teachers were and everything. Kayleigh would always tell me about this one teacher; Mr Haidon, she absolutely adored him, she told me how funny he was and that she dragged him all the way into good guys to show him of a mistake he had made.

 

Kayleigh was always teaching me on how to be an even better friend than I was. Me and Kayleigh after a long period of time realized that we both struggled on the same subjects, MATHS we both hated it and found it very difficult and confusing.

 

Kayleigh was my best friend and a very loyal and true friend as well, I loved her so much [in a friend way] and looked up to her for advice many times. It will be hard getting used to her not being around anymore but I will always remember her as my best friend and a very talented girl, she was absolutely amazing and warm hearted.

 

You are still my bestie K.K and don't forget it

Favourite TV shows

We don't watch a lot of TV in our house mainly because of the home theatre system and the fac that there is NOTHING on TV. Kayleigh did have some fovourite TV shows, which she watched when they were on:

• Doctor Who - Kayleigh liked David Tennent and Billie Piper and didn't mind 'Donna'. She didn't really get into the new doctor.
• Merlin
• Avatar - the last airbender
• Winx
• Top Gear UK (absolute favourite as she watched it with her dad)
• Total Wipeout
• Deal or No Deal (Cause I watched it and we always tried to guess the bankers offers)
• The Simpsons
• The Big Bang Theory - although she was only just getting into it when she died.

School: Year 3

In Year 3, Kayleigh had the formidable Ms Gow - now don't get me wrong, Ms Gow is a fantastic teacher and a really nice person, but the students she had respected her and they did not play up. Ms Gow retired a couple of years ago and still does relief work at Theodore and all the students still fear her!

Kayleigh had a great year 3 - she went on camp for the first time to Kianinny - which is down at the coast where she went kayaking and swimming. I think those 3 days were much harder on Terence than it was on Kayleigh :)

Kayleigh did her homework tasks quite happily - because they were fun! One of the tasks was to make a model of a movie character - Kayleigh chose the Gingerbread Man from Shrek  - so we made a cake, cut it into the shape and iced it appropriately. When she took it in the next day everyone was impressed and Ms Gow told her it was fantastic. I think the other students though so as they all started doing cakes and biscuits things for the model.

Kayleigh did a diorama of a Harry Potter scene - the quidditch match in the Prisoner of Azkaban wher Harry is chased by dementors. She made clouds from cotton wool balls and strung up the demetors - it looked quite good.

Year 3 was also the year that she had a falling out with the person who was to later become her biggest bully.

Family: Terry

Kayleigh was 4 when Terry was born - the year she started preschool. Terry and Kayleigh had a good brother sister relationship that was recently starting to evolve into a more mature one. Although they argued and fought - and  do mean fought - with fists and things (which Kayleigh won), they did have a mutual respect for each other.

Kayleigh was our sporty child - flexible and fast. Terry is our brainy one - he loves maths and science - he was doing fractions in Year 1. Terry loved to race Kayleigh around the backyard, or down to school, and always lost. Kayleigh was not good at maths, and so she used Terry's ability - by getting him to do her maths homework. I still remember her giving Terry a sheet of algebra earlier in the year and telling him if h couldn't do it he was no good at maths. He complete it and Kayleigh got 100% on her homework task. Naughty girl.

At the funeral, Terry recounted how he had told Kayleigh that the brakes on his bike were really good and if you braked too hard the back wheel would come off the ground. Kayleigh didn't believe him and she tried it out herself. She pedalled round the backyard getting up speed and slammed the brake on. The bike went up on the front wheel, almost to 60 degrees and it almost toppled over. Kayleighs face was priceless!

Terry misses Kayleigh alot - she has always been there for him. The last thing he said to her was goodnight. and he remembers being pissed off at her the night before because she wanted him to do something he didn't want to and they had an argument.

On top of Tuggeranong reserve
Natassja, Mum, Kayleigh, Kiara, Terry, Dad and Lucas

Forgiveness

Kayleigh was very forgiving to all people that she knew. We always brought her up to be nice to everyone, no matter what they were like. Terence told Kayleigh to be extra nice to people that were nasty to her as it disarmed them and gave them nothing to be nasty about. We told her to think about not what the nasty people were saying but the reason why they might be saying it - they might not even be lashing out at her,  they might be having a bad day or something might be going wrong at home or something.

There was only one person that Kayleigh would never forgive. A girl that bullied Natassja and to some extent Kayleigh - it was physical bullying (not just verbal) and the only reason we could conclude about why was that this girl thought it was fun. Kayleigh could never forgive this.

Kayleigh biggest bully from primary school, Kayleigh would still be nice to and talk to when we saw her at the shops. She didn't have to like her, but there was no reason to be nasty herself.

Kayleigh somehow could forgive people for what they did, something that I wish I could do, to be  better person. To forgive people for their faults and see the good in them.an to not hold grudges.

In the last couple of months before Kayleighs death, she had a falling out with two people in her friendship group "H and S" - the reason was rather silly - it started in PE when they were playing touch football - Kayleigh said 'Pass the ball to me so we can get a try' and one of these girls took that to man 'you're too slow, i'm faster so you can't score' (or something like that). Then later in the game, the other girl was complaining of a grass allergy and they all suggested that she rinse her arms in water. as they were on the Calwell ovals there was no water close by - they started getting a bit silly saying - you need a river, or a lake or the ocean. Kayleigh piped up and said 'Just use the storm water drain ' (as a joke) and the girl who initially was pissed at Kayleigh turned around and said 'Nice one Kayleigh, you just want her to drown'. H and S then walked off. H especially turned nasty - she told people that Kayleigh had AIDS (which also meant I had a great conversation with Kayleigh about what AIDs was) and pretended o push her in front of a car at the end of school. She deliberately bumped into her between classes and made fun of her weight.

What did Kayleigh do about this. after talking about it with us, she ignored the behaviour for a few weeks to let the emotions settle. Then when she saw H or S by themselves she would say Hi and smile then keep going. Kayleigh realised that H had alot going o in he life outside of school and some of this might be related to how she was acting. Kayleigh chose not to hold a grudge or to be nasty. She chose to settle things down and find a way to at least be civil to each other. They had got to he 'Hi, how are you' stage when Kayleigh died.

The one thing that stood out after is that the people who had been nasty to Kayleigh have now realised that they can't take it back - they can't say sorry for what they did. H came up to me after the funeral and said that she was sorry - the things they were fighting over was just because she wanted someone to be angry at - she had chosen to be angry at Kayleigh for little reason and now she couldn't take back that time. I must say I wasn't really impressed and told her to think about Kayleigh next time she just wanted to be angry at someone for no reason ( I am not as good as Kayleigh at forgiveness) and then re-think about what she was doing because sometimes you do things that you can't take back ever.

Final Photos

Here are the last photos we haveof Kayleigh when she was still 'alive'.

1st May 2010 - the last photo I took before Kayleigh collapsed

Kayleigh - 7:52pm. All of the drip lines and machines are still on.

Kayleigh - 7:51pm. Natassja took ths pic

8:18pm - very last photo.
After this they started disconnecting everything

Family: Lucas

Kayleigh and Lucas' bond is probably the hardest to define. Lucas was only 6 when Kayleigh died. Kayleigh was 7 when Lucas was born. Lucas still wakes up every morning ad thefirst thing he says is 'Kayleigh - I love you' and he stated quite angrily after Kayleigh died that he wanted to go to heaven and punch God in the face for what he did.

Kayleigh and Lucas got on, as a younger brother / oldest sister usually does. Kayleigh did not have to same bond with Lucas as she did with Kiara but she did care alot about her littlest brother and tried to help him hen he let her. Lucas is stubborn - if he doesn't want to do something then he won't - he digs himself in and will not give ground. Kayleigh was good at negotiating with him, to try and get him to do things he didn't want to. Kayleigh talked him into getting dressed i the mornings for school (Lucas did not like his kindergarten teacher and refused to go). She got him to read his home readers - I think she bribed him - and she got him to help clean his room.

Lucas loved Mario Kart Wii and Super Mario Bros and Kayleigh would spend time with Lucas helping him unlock new characters and karts and finishing levels - I think that is the memory that Lucas has of Kayleigh and the ones that I think define their relationship - Kayleigh and Lucas playing the Wii, with Kayleigh patiently waiting for Lucas to catch up so he could 'win' the race and Kayleigh being quite happy to let him.

School: Year 2

For year 2, Kayleigh had Ms Sellers for a teacher and she was fantastic. Kayleigh reading and maths improved. Kayleigh also made a couple of friends. There were worrying incidents though. Kayleigh was pinned down on the ground by a boy for reasons we never found out. Kayleigh also one day pulled out all of her eye lashes - again we never found out why.

Kayleigh also had a new brother at home - Lucas - as well as Natassja in Year 1 and Terry who was still at home. It was an uneventful year at school and there is nothing about ti that really stands out. Kayleigh loved school and she loved going.

Favourite Food :)

Kayleigh was skinny (genetics) but she loved food. I really didn't realise how much she ate until she was no longer here.

Kayleigh liked a lot of different things, we never really let them have lollies or chips or junk food, and as she got older she realised that those sorts of things weren't healthy and n her quest to be healthy, she started avoiding them too.Although she did go too far and refused to eat Jam sandwiches because Jam is high in sugar - so Mr Haidon and I came up with a plan that the canteen at school would make her salad sandwiches - that way we could make sure she was eating her lunch and she was happy she was eating healthy.

Kayleighs favourite foods were (not in any order):

• Spaghetti ( see Jess Chapmans Spaghetti Girl )
• Roast pork - especially crackling - Kayleigh would take the crackling off the pork when it was still in the oven - one time she ate almost 60% of the crackling before it was cooked.
• Zappos -strawberry flavoured
• Salad sandwiches - or as Kaylegh said 'Healthy sandwiches'
• Pasta - anything with pasta - pasta bake, lasagna
• Brussel Sprouts (I hate them, Kayleigh liked them ewwwwwww!)
• Fruit - all types f fruit. I think she would have had at least 4 pieces of fruit a day
• Tic Tacs - Citrus flavoured
• Chuppa Chups - Strawberries and cream
• BBQ's

Being Silly- short video

This is a short (7 secs) video that Kayleigh did on her phone on the 30th April 2010 -Shows her an Natassja at  their best :)

Silver Jacket

Kayleigh was given a silver jacket by her nanny at the age of 3. Nanny had originally bought the jacket when she in England for Kayleighs cousin who is 4 year older, but she didn't want it.

When Kayleigh first got the jacket is went down to her feet - it was that big - but she wore it everytime it rained. Kayleigh wore it from pre-school up until it fell apart around year 5. I must say it was very well made to last that long!

Kayleigh - her silver jacket, Natassja at Jenolan caves

Kayleigh and Natassja - Rainforest Gully - Tidbinbilla

Family: Kiara

Kiara is Kayleigh's youngest sister. She was born just after Kayleigh turned 9. Kayleigh and Kiara - my K girls - were very close, even with the large age difference. Kiara and Kayleigh shared a double bed since Kiara was about 14 months old. Kayleigh had no issue is changing her nappies or helping feed Kiara when she was little - She liked feeding Kiara as Kayleigh also liked to eat the baby food as well - like the apples so one for Kiara, one for Kayleigh. Kayleigh was also the first person Kiara would go toilet for when we were toilet training her.

As Kiara grew up, Kayleigh helped her to talk and walk - Kiara initially could only say 'Ay-e' for Kayleigh. Kayleigh doted on Kiara. Kayleigh loved playing with Kiara with her My Little Ponies and singing silly songs. She helped Kiara on the trampoline and riding her bike. Kayleigh was also the only one to help Kiara play Mario Kart on the Wii, even though Kiara really was not old enough to do it, Kayleigh helped her by steering the wii remote and Kiara would press the buttons - Kiara always played as Princess Peach.

Every morning, Kiara got Kayleigh to help her find her shoes and brush her hair. Kayleigh always go Kiara to go to sleep at night - sometimes by singing to her, and sometimes by scaring her by saying - 'if you get out of beds the rats will get you' (at that stage Kiara had Tinkerbell and the Lost Treasure and she was scared of the rats in the movie). Kiara adored Kayleigh.

Everyday Kiara says 'I love Kayleigh' and every couple of days, out of the blue, Kiara will say "I want my Kayleigh back" and she looks so sad . . . .

Kayleigh and Kiara - 25th April 2010